Forever Loved

♪I will not take my love away when praises cease and seasons change. While the whole world turns the other way, I will not take my love away. I will not leave you all alone. When striving leads you far from home, and there's no yield for what you've sown, I will not leave you all alone. I will give you what you need in plenty or in poverty. Forever, always, look to me and I will give you what you need.♫ -Matt Wertz "I Will Not Take My Love Away"

While listening to Pandora in the library, I stumbled across this artist, Matt Wertz. I quickly paused Pandora and moved my way to youtube where I have been listening to his songs nonstop. They are so chill, simple, and I love them. This is quite possibly my favorite. When I say simple, I mean simple. The whole song is posted above. This song is a perfect representation of God's love for us as individuals. He will never take His love away despite the changes that come and when we move away from Him. As humans, I think we have trouble grasping this concept. We love because we are loved. Meaning that we love someone when they show their love to us and when they choose to move out of our lives and not to love us anymore, we often let them do just that. But God, wow, God would never do that to us. His love is never ending and even when we cease to praise Him, cease to love Him, and the world hates us, He keeps on loving us. What a wonderful picture drawn out by the cross and our loving God. 

The other message in this song is that He will give us what we need. Matthew 6:26 reads, "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?" This verse is a constant reminder that God is the sole provider of our lives and everything in them. Like the song says "I will give you what you need in plenty or in poverty. Forever, always, look to Me and I will give you what you need." I have never heard God's sovereignty and grace summed up in a better way.

I challenge you to remember that God will provide and that He is there no matter what the circumstances.

More Than Just Words

"These people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far from me. They worship me in vain; their teachings are but rules taught by men." Matthew 15:8-9

http://www.myspace.com/music/player?sid=74898293&ac=now

"So many prayers spoken out loud.

So many words and promises vowed.

I told You I loved You so many times,

but I want to show You that love with my life.

With more than just words that I speak from my mouth,

I want to give You my thoughts before they're even out.

Every ambition, every dream I dream.

More than just talk from dry lips, You're all that there is.

with all of my heart Father I want to give

more than the things I know You've already heard.

More than just words."

Above are the lyrics to a song by Carl Cartee. Who is Carl Cartee? Just a regular old singer/songwriter who no one has seem to ever heard of and who loves the Lord and uses his talents to prove just that. I heard him a few years ago at a summer camp where he led worship. Some of his songs changed my life. They gave me a new outlook on things in my life. One of those things being they way I interact with God, and one of those songs being the one posted above.

This song is about getting past the routine prayers and acts we do towards God, and to speak and live every part of our lives for His glory. It is an invitation to make every move and take every moment with Him in mind.  If we could get this down, how different would our lives be! The downside for me personally is that I struggle with this everyday. I am selfish. I go to church, read my Bible every night, pray pretty often, and, although that is more than a lot of people do, it is no where near enough. The straight facts are that my life thrives because God is a part of it, and all too often I forget that He is the sole reason for my existence. I want my lips, my thoughts, my heart and everything in between to honor God. So the challenge for you (but mainly for myself) is to thank God for everything, everyday. I aspire to get past the useless traditions that much of Christianity still has today, to find God in the midst of it all, and to remember that every moment is another moment given to me to love and serve God. "All of my life in every season, You are still God! I have a reason to sing; I have a reason to worship!"

Jason Hadden

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrong. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." -1 Corinthians 13:4-7

This is a rare blog. Unlike most others that you will read (from me at least), but this is just me wearing my heart on my sleeve and putting it out there.

A year and a halfish ago, I began dating a very special guy. Since October 16, 2010 (and even before then), Jason Hadden has been able to show me God's love in ways that no one else could. He has attained more respect from me than any other person my age, and he has deserved ever bit of it (and still deserves more than I can give). I aspire to have half of his humility, a pinch of his theological considerations, and as much love for people as he has. He has been a backbone and a great friend to me.  God has provided me with more than I could have ever imagined having in a boyfriend. Shoutout and much thanks go out to him.

Now I spent a lot of time trying to figure out if I loved Jason Hadden. Most people just say "I love you" on a whim; they base it off of emotions in that moment. I did not want to be one of those people. To be honest, when I asked myself the question "do I love him?" I didn't know the answer. I hear stories about how people just know, but I am not one of those people. I had never been in love before; I had no idea what it was supposed to be like. Surely not like the movies, surely not like my parents love after 20ish years of marriage, I just had no idea. I needed a definition. Problem:  Love seems to be different for everyone, if you look up the definition of love, you will never be able to simply define it. So how did I know if I loved him? I turned to 1 Corinthians 13. One night I sat in my bed, wondering if I loved him or not. I was not doubting my feelings, but I feel that love is so much more than feelings. Feelings come and go, passions fade, and when everything drifts off into the unknown, you should be left with love despite it all.

When I turned to 1 Corinthians that night, I went through every part of its definition of love and figured out if I acted/felt that way towards Jason.
#1-Love is patient-Anyone who has stood in a line with me, or who has had to wait with me anywhere will know that I am not a naturally patient person. I am stuck in the right-here-right-now society that we all live in. The difference is that, with Jason, he can take his time doing whatever. Patient? Check!
#2-Love is kind-Ill be the first (an possibly only) person to admit it. I can be a mean spirited person. I like nothing more than revenge.  Spitefulness is one of my many shortcomings.  However, never have I ever desired anything spiteful on him. Kind? Check!
#3-It does not envy-I am not a very envious person. I don't envy his past relationships and I don't envy the attention he gives other people. No envy? Check!
#4-It does not boast-In my opinion, if you have to tell the whole world that you are in love, is it really love? People should be able to look at you and tell. (This blog is an exception and is a first in an almost year-and-a-half-long relationship) :)

For the sake of space and time, I will go ahead and cover proud, rude, self-seeking, and easily angered all in one. I am proud to be Jason Hadden's girlfriend, but I am not haughty about it. I hope that when I talk about him to my friends that they don't see it as rubbing it in their faces that I have a boyfriend, or anything of the sort. I can be rude, but I never want to be rude with him. Self-seeking is a tough one. It is hard to put him (and all other people for that matter) before myself. I am selfish and I want everything out of the relationship that I can get. But that's not the right attitude. I have to constantly remind myself to care for, love, and serve others before myself.  Angered...has Jason made me upset before? Yes. Angry? No. Anger is a hard feeling to get over and is deeply embedded within complicated situations.  We have a simple love. No complications, no hard feelings, no anger.

Keeps no record of wrong...here's the toughest one for me with all people, not just him. I keep track of wrongs; forgive and forget does not work with me. I do not forget when I have been hurt. I have to remind myself everyday that "he didn't purposefully try to make me feel insert gloomy feeling/disgust when he insert action that happened months ago that I just cannot forget about." It is a constant battle, but its easier with Jason than with most people.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth-I can be straight up honest with Jason. I can tell him the truth about things and know he wont judge me, hold things against me, or get angry with me. I think that this is one that I appreciate the most.

In conclusion, I would do anything to protect him; I always have his back.  I trust him and his judgement in all situations and with all decisions, even if they are not what I would do in those situations.  With us, I always hope for the best in the future, and I will go to all lengths in attempt to make this good thing we have going last as long as possible.

This blog was long as mess! But this was the long and intense process that I went through to come to the conclusion that I love Jason Hadden. I wouldn't have it any other way :) Blessed Beyond Comparison

*insert syringe of insulin now* :P

Redeem

"God, to redeem us at the deepest portion of our nature-the urge to love and be loved-must reveal His nature in an incredible and impossible way. He must reveal it at the cross." -E. Stanley Jones

This past weekend, I attended a conference along with about 450 other BCM students from across the state of  South Carolina.  On Sunday morning, the main speaker was talking about how he did not expect us to retain everything we heard this weekend, but he hoped that something took out to us and that we left changed in some aspect of our lives. For me, that changed can be summed up in one word...Redeemed. I have heard the word over and over again and I even know what it means and can give a good definition for it; however, one of the speakers made redemption a very visual image for me this past weekend and I know that I will never look at it the same way again.

I have always just looked at redemption as a sort of payment.  It's how Jesus died so that I could be redeemed from my sin and be free. His image suggested something a little different.  It was compared to an arcade. When  you go to an arcade, you win tickets and you redeem them for a prize. Now if you were to watch any young child redeeming their tickets, they stare at the glass for what seems like hours, contemplating what to get. They want to make sure they get just the right item, the perfect trinket and something that they really love. God has done the same for us. He has turned in His son as the payment, and has picked us out specifically to be His prized possession. This is a story of being sought after, a image of being loved, a story of worth and value, and the sign of a proud Father who has gained a great possession. This is the story that all men need to hear. That they are loved, they are worth something, and that there is someone desperately trying to get them from behind the glass and take them home.  Thankfully, God has enough tickets and has already turned over His payment for His prize. Matthew 20:28 says, "Just as the son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many." The price is paid and we are free to go home with our Father who loves us dearly and who considers us worth the price of giving His only son. Amazing!

I challenge you to find your worth in God and constantly remind others that they have value and love in Jesus Christ.

Written in Red

“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church. If they still refuse to listen to the church, then consider them Gentiles or tax-collectors" -Matthew 18:15-17

How do you firmly handle the one's you love in Christian kindness when they don't want to hear you out? Personally, I have only confronted one person in a matter of their sin, and that was an easy turn around that was taken no further than me and that person and that I still yet to speak of to any one else.  Maybe this is because I am afraid of repercussions, or maybe just because all my friends are perfect people, but the more likely reasons is because I only confront people that I care deeply for.

I cannot imagine my own sins being pointed out to me. Embarrassment, shame, guilt. First thing I would do is flip to Matthew 7:3 that says, "Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in a friends eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye." Or flip a few verses prior and spout off, Matthew 7:1, "Do not judge lest you too be judged." The defenses would go up faster than a blink of an eye. I would be doing anything in my power to justify my means. Problem:  Before you interpret those verses in Matthew 7, or others like it, you must use them in context. Before Matthew 7 is the Sermon on the Mount. To sum it up, the Sermon on the Mount addresses motives and sin. As sinners we tend to minimize or rationalize our transgressions and magnify the the wrong we see in others lives. We cannot judge someones internal righteousness, but we can address sins in a loving manner with Christlike motives at hand.

Now let's skip a few chapters and hop on over to Matthew 18. The verse at the beginning of this post is the subject matter. Addressing out faults in others. Can you do it without judging? ...Yes. If you love someone with Christ's love, then you can address their sins without judgement. What is Christ's love? Dying for them...would you be willing to do it? To them, it may feel like you are ganging up on them, but with the right intentions this is far from the truth. If you follow the guidelines of Matthew 18:15 and go to them one on one to begin with, there's no ganging up. If you end up having to pull another person into it, it is simply to prevent the "he-said/she-said" complex. Finally, last resort, get the church involved. Maybe not the actual "church," but a group of Christians who love and care for that person and want to see them grow in Christ. Again, let's take Matthew 18 passage in context. Given the context, calling someone out on his or her sin displays a willingness to care for a flock member from perishing (Parable of the lost sheep found just previous to this passage). This passage does not say a specific sin that has to be at issue, but it does question the motives of the Christians calling another brother or sister out. They are to care about the well being of the members of God's family who have gone astray, but are deeply important to the Father.

Now what if someone goes through all this trouble only to find that a brother still will not repent from their sins? Jesus tells us that they are to be treated as a Gentile or a tax collector...so hate them? ...of course not. That means love them more than ever, because they are lost.

Now for a couple challenges...
Challenge #1-If you've gone astray and a fellow Christian is pointing out your sins, don't assume they are out to get you.
Challenge #2-If you claim to be a Christian, prove it. Prove it with your speech, your actions, your intentions, your honesty, and your humility.
Challenge #3-If you claim to be a Christian and you blatantly refuse to turn from sin and you have no convictions over things that are written in the Bible, take a second to look at yourself and decide which side of the fence you are on.
Challenge #4-If you do fall into that last category, disregard everything I have written, it does not apply to you. As my pastor says often, "don't expect a lost person to act like a Christian, they're lost."
Challenge #5- If you are going to be calling a fellow Christian out, check your intentions before any word is uttered. If your motives are Christlike, continue.


*"If it isn't in black and white in the Bible, that's probably because it is in red."